Fear Of The Unknown

March 2020 has been the strangest month of my life (and I know I’m not alone when I say that). March should have been the best month yet for The A Team. We had the extremely talented Kaea Pearce in for a workshop. If you don’t already know… she recently danced alongside J-LO at the Superbowl 2020, and she’s also danced with the likes of Little Mix, Justin Bieber, Jason Derulo, and Rihanna (it was a pretty big deal for us all and a surreal experience!) Plus, we were due to EXPAND the studio to make room for more classes, new teachers, and many more exciting opportunities. I started this month going to work as normal, really taking for granted those in-studio moments, watching the talent that I’m faced with on a daily, the friendships, the social interaction, the laughter, the smiles. Thank God we managed to squeeze in the workshop with Kaea, but I obviously had to cancel the building work. And although it’s not quite the end of March 2020, I know I will end this month in a completely different way to how it started, as we all will due to COVID-19. We really are living in the unknown.

On Friday 20th March, I decided to close the doors to The A Team Dance & Fitness for the foreseeable future. It was (and still very much is) heartbreaking. I felt numb. Although my inbox was filled with supportive, kind messages, I couldn’t control the tears. I felt as though all the hard work and everything I’d built up had just been snatched from me. I felt huge amounts of guilt for taking away my dancer’s hobby. I didn’t know what to say and I didn’t know what to do next. I know I am not the only one going through this terrible time, but I also know how alone you can feel when something you love is taken away like that. I know friends who been forced to cancel their weddings, and some of these weddings being abroad that they’ve planned years in advance. I know people who have been saving for years for their holiday of a lifetime, and it’s been cancelled with a click of the fingers. I know my grandma is living completely isolated with my granddad, who has dementia and constantly asking why he can’t leave the house. I know my best friend who is living in Australia has had to cancel her flight home to meet her new baby nephew. It’s absolutely heartbreaking for many and I don’t think anybody has the right words. The world is living in absolute chaos.

Obviously money makes everybody worry, and don’t get me wrong, I’ve done the whole “what if this” and “what if that”. But even though I have studio rent to consider, mortgage and bills for our home, and a family to feed, the thing that is worrying me the most is how we’re going to resume normality whilst living in the midst of this madness. I’ve spent the past few days planning online classes for my dance students, yet I’ve thrown the towel in 659374 times (excuse the exaggeration ha) because it’s just madness that this is even what I’m having to consider. I’ve also had my first experience of homeschooling my step-son today and I didn’t even know the answer to the questions! WHAT IS GOING ON?!?!?!

I don’t really know the reason for writing this blog post (probably the boredom that I’m experiencing right now, as I’m used to dancing for 5/6 hours per evening) but as a few days have passed, I’ve definitely become more positive. I will never ever take for granted that studio space. NEVER EVER AGAIN. I will never take for granted the simpleness of teaching face-to-face and being able to physically touch or cough without feeling guilty. I am determined to be more focused than ever during this time-out and I will make sure The A Team comes back with a bang.

To the dance students…

Stay focused at home with your school work, but make sure you give yourself chance to dance. Use this time to practise those moves that you’ve always wanted to achieve, work on your stretches to improve your flexibility, watch your favourite dancer’s videos, take inspiration from them. Just stay positive! We’re all in this together and we will come out stronger and more appreciative than ever before. I’m right behind you! (P.s. take part in our weekly TikTok challenges, I’ve created them to make YOU smile!)

All we can do from here is take each day as it comes, be kind, and support everybody around us as much as possible. See you on the flip side!

Lots of love,

Abbie. X

Happier times in our workshop with Kaea Pearce. Keep smiling kids. X

6 thoughts on “Fear Of The Unknown”

  1. Cried reading this. You’re amazing Abbie, such a horrible and confusing time for everyone. I as a parent will make sure Ava Carry’s on her dancing until we are back. Sending a lot of cuddles and reassurance your way! X

  2. Your words echo how we are all feeling. My nursery took the decision to close today too, I feel like I’m letting all them children and their parents down ☹️ it’s just the most gut wrenching awful time. But, like you, I’m trying to remain positive and do what is right at this time. Hopefully in a few months we’ll all be happy and healthy and put this god awful time behind us.
    Your positivity is contagious. The girls adore you. Evie worships the ground you walk on and I know she will cartwheel (not really) back into that studio when the time comes!!!!
    Take care Abbie, we love you lots xxxx

  3. Such a heart felt message and know that each and everyone of us will be behind you and support you. One thing my 2 girls have not stopped doing whilst being isolated at home is dance!!! They look forward to stating their classes this week. We really miss our dance community and the support we give each other both parents and pupils and can’t wait to be reunited. All we can do is keep positive and stick together. Sending you lots of love The Booths ❤

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